Ren Reads (and More) | Taking Care of You

'Tis the season, folks! We are right on the cusp of the ultimate time of year. With Thanksgiving just around the corner and Christmas slowly but surely creeping its way to the forefront, it is safe to assume we all will have a lot on our plate soon -- and, yes, that pun was intended. Before we get all caught up in the festivities, it is important to prepare ourselves mentally. As jolly as this time can be for some, it can be quite the opposite for others. In fact, no matter who you are or how you feel about the holiday season, I feel like it is downright overwhelming for everyone. With that in mind, I threw together a very unofficial and far less-than-professional guide to surviving the holidays while prioritizing you and your mental health. It is the season of giving after all, so it is time to give back to yourself! 

Let's begin with what I think is the most underrated precaution we all should be taking this season: sleep. I am here to tell you to never underestimate a good night’s sleep. It can be so easy for a decent sleep to be the first thing abandoned when cramming in buying and wrapping gifts, decorating, taking part in all the festive activities, and preparing a smorgasbord of food. Not to mention the amount of sleep and rest some of us put to the side each year to work more to have more money for the holidays. While all of that is important, it will not do any good if you are too exhausted (mentally and physically) to participate fully and enjoy these things. I have found that although the excitement of Santa coming to town is palpable, the adult version of me has learned to get just as holly jolly with a full 8 hours of rest. 

Okay, now we can move on to the actual days of celebration themselves. You know exactly where I am going. That’s right, the great feasts I hope we all get to partake in for both Thanksgiving and Christmas, if that is what your tradition allows. Let me tell you something: I may not have the appetite of a warrior at battle, but when it comes to holiday food, consider me on the front lines. So, here is my advice for this year: eat whatever and however much you want. You want seconds? Heck yeah! You want a slice of each dessert your family made? Go for it! Eat one of everything if that makes you happy. Who cares what anyone will say? Do not let anyone question the amount of times you get back up to get a deviled egg. No, Karen, I am not full. I want another mountain load o mashed potatoes and three slices of coconut cake. Is that a problem? Also, I am so sorry if your name is Karen; I am sure you are a lovely individual. Your body is your body and it needs to be fueled. You do not have to earn the right to eat what you want -- you already deserve it. 

I want to quickly touch on grief during the holidays. I will not spend much time on this subject considering it is something I still struggle with and unfortunately do not have any stellar tips for. I just want to point out that it is perfectly okay to still grieve those that are no longer with us at this time of year (or any time), no matter how long it has been. Our passed loved ones play such a large role in the holidays and it is hard not to think about them in a bittersweet manner. You are allowed to cry about it and you are allowed to miss them. Keep them in your heart during the holidays. Also, I am 100% sure they are proud of the person you have become and are with you every single day. 

Lastly, let’s talk about boundaries. The holidays can be a time where some people feel like certain, potentially sensitive topics can be up for discussion. In light of the election, I can imagine a lot of your holiday conversations might be centered around politics. Or maybe it's your family asking where your partner is and when they can expect new little additions to the family. While there may be good intentions in starting such conversations, they can be triggering or overwhelming for some people. It is totally fine to set boundaries and shut down these conversations if they make you uncomfortable. The holidays are supposed to be a time of joy, not panic and dread. On the opposite side, please do not be the one to start those unwanted conversations. Don’t be a Scrooge. People will live their life at the pace that they can and want to and there is nothing wrong with that. If you need to develop an escape plan when things get overwhelming, I encourage you to do so. Grab your favorite cousin, some dinner rolls, and escape to the nearest guest room to chill out and recenter yourself before returning to the celebration if you need to. 

I can only hope these tips were at least a little bit helpful. I have accumulated them from experience, so I like to think I know what I am talking about -- at least 40% of the time.

Above everything else, take care of yourself this season and every season. Life is so incredibly fragile, yet so worth living. You are so incredibly important and you deserve to feel joyous 365 days of the year. I hope you have the most amazing holiday season. Keep all of your favorite traditions alive.

Speaking of that, do you want to know my favorite tradition? My parents and I go to Waffle House each Christmas morning in our pajamas.

Anyway, blast those holiday tunes, reignite that inner child, and eat as many pieces of tha dang pie as you want!