The end is nigh as we gaze upon Week Thirteen with tears in our eyes. A few quality match-ups scatter amongst a schedule of cupcakes as most teams ready for Rivalry Week. But we are here for you once again with our best guess at the best bets with the lowest stress. Here are our college football picks of the week!
2019 ATS Record
Blaine Duncan: 22-13-1 (Week Twelve: 3-0)
TD Wood: 14-20-2 (Week Twelve: 0-3)
Letting the cat make my picks last week proved to be fruitful. Piper — she’s the cat — went 3-0. If you think that I’m not going to let her paws go back to work for me again, you’re crazy. She was insightful, getting everything despite having hardly ever paid attention to football at all. She really likes the road dogs this week, so don’t tell her that’s what you call a visiting team who is not picked for victory!
Penn State (+18.5) at Ohio State: The games this week are like my food bowl with no Iams! Bad! This may be the only one worth watching. I like lions because really I’m just like them: I’m fierce and mean. These Nittany Lions will go into Columbus and be beaten, but a Buckeye won’t get a 19-point win! Those Lions will scratch and hiss, and I like that! The early morning game doesn’t help Buckeyes, but it helps Nittany Lions looking for food. When this one is over, it’ll be late in the day. I’ll be ready for a nap.
Kansas State (+2.5) at Texas Tech: A Raider sounds like someone who would come and take my bowl of food like my mean sisters do! I like the Wildcats because I, too, am a wildcat. I think that the Wildcats for this Kansas State school will win even though they’re not at home. I know it’s tough not to be at home. I always meow like crazy in the car. When Kansas State wins, I’ll chase my sisters out of the litter box.
TCU (+19) at Oklahoma: I don’t know what a Sooner is but I know what a frog is! I’ve seen them jump around outside, and they’re fast! I think the Horned Frogs will be a tough fight for whatever a Sooner is. I think that the Sooners win but they’ll be drained from last week’s cat fight. Nineteen is a big number. I can’t count that high! Oklahoma will only win by seventeen and then I’ll clean myself for the night and find a warm blanket to shed my fur.
Whoo boy, November has not been kind to your ol’ buddy TD. Perhaps I’m overthinking things and ignoring the obvious. Not too big a weekend in terms of playoff impact, but a few rivalries and some important conference games are going down, and I like the big home favorites this week.
Penn State at Ohio State (-19.5): That’s a huge line for a game between two top ten teams, but Ohio St. hasn’t even come close to being touched this season, and Penn St. has scrapped their way to 9-1. If this one were in Happy Valley, I’d be inclined to say the Nittany Lions would hang around. But it’s not in Beaver Stadium, and the Buckeyes have just looked so damn good. I think they take advantage of Penn State’s suspect pass defense and hit a few big plays en route to a comfortable win.
Texas A&M at Georgia (-13): There’s a lot of talk about the surging Aggies, and while it’s true they’ve won four in a row, it isn’t all that impressive. One look at their schedule and you’ll see they’ve beaten the teams they should’ve, loss to the teams they should’ve, and lost their one swing game. Georgia still needs to find ways to make big plays, but they’re in the fight for the playoff and have every reason to show up with ill intent and beat down A&M.
UCLA at USC (-13.5): The Trojans haven’t lived up to their playoff aspirations this season, but what the football gods taketh, they giveth back in the form of freshman QB Kedon Slovis. He’s really taken to the Air Raid offense, and aside from the Oregon loss has been tearing it up lately. UCLA might get there under Chip Kelly, but at this stage they’re still too inconsistent to be trusted. Trojans roll in this one.
Note: All games are Against the Spread. Odds are taken from the Westgate Las Vegas Superbook.
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